Essay Ally

Orthodox Jewish Women and Modernity 

 

Introduction

Orthodox and ultra-Orthodox Jewish women practice an unusually traditional lifestyle in a modern world. These two worlds tend to collide, which forces Orthodox Jewish women to reject the modern world, opt for a secular existence or blend the two seemingly opposing spheres together. Ultimately, though, Orthodox Judaism can never achieve a complete separation from modernity. Orthodox Jewish women constantly interact with the outside world through friendships, education, and employment. These women also remain intensely aware of feminist criticisms that regard Orthodox Judaism as patriarchal and oppressive to women. Orthodox Jewish women struggle to meet the demands and respond to the critiques of modern observers. In a few cases, women wish to incorporate modern values into Orthodox Judaism, which often poses complicated and problematic dilemmas to women and religious leaders. This paper attempts to address the relationship of modernity to Orthodox and ultra-Orthodox Jewish women. We seek to examine several features of Orthodox Judaism, such as prayer, menstruation, and kollel (male religious teaching) to better understand the challenges devout Orthodox women face in a secular society. Finally, we aim to evaluate how Orthodox Jewish women cope with the expectations and temptations of the modern world and Judaism and the conclusions these women reach.

Prayer and Tradition

The Orthodox traditions of prayer are the most striking rejection of American modernity. In the United States, a country built on the foundation of separation from church and state, most people live a life governed by secular laws and traditions. For Orthodox Jews this is not the case. Most Orthodox live strictly by Halakha (applied Talmudic law) and Kashrut (Jewish dietary law). These traditions involve shopping in special stores for Kosher foods, having separate dishes for meat and cheese products and raising children to observe these laws and know their responsibilities as men and women. These traditions place a great burden on women to be responsible for the home and family. They must provide for the family and allow the husband to follow his duties of prayer and study.

But not all Orthodox women are satisfied simply standing behind a mechitza and silently mouthing the prayers as their husbands voice the words to G-d. Some have even taken the step of demanding equality and a place on the bimah as part of their American upbringing (Diner, 401) While women by right have duties under Kashrut and are responsible for lighting candles and supporting their husbands prayer, some women have started stepping up from behind the mechitza (419). For many Orthodox women, the duty to their husbands is still present in mind and a less radical solution to outright religious integration and equality is to form separate prayer groups outside the shul where the women can still remain committed to Halakhic restrictions (Wolowelsky, 98).

Between Modern Orthodox and Chasidic communities there has been widespread variation of how permissive congregations have been with women participating in traditionally male religious roles. Many Modern Orthodox have gone as far as allowing women to recite the song of songs, mourners prayer, and the blessing over the wine with little stigma (Cantor, 430). Women have even begun to take on traditional male teaching roles with nearly all the duties of a Rebbe. In these cases, the women are unable to achieve official sanction but still obtain nearly all responsibility and honor of their male counterparts (Wolowelsky, 120). For more traditional and conservative Chasidic communities, women continue to fulfill the roles of tradition. Few Chasidic women fail to fulfill the responsibilities of niddah, Kashrut, and Halakha. They are satisfied with the dignity of these positions (Diner, 421).

Most Orthodox women embrace the fundamentals of Halakha despite outsider criticism. Feminists would accuse these women of rejecting progress but most Orthodox point to their satisfaction, happiness, and spiritual fulfillment from doing their traditional duties. Even with such strict religious laws there is still room for secular activities that do not violate tradition. The same Orthodox women who pray behind a curtain, may lecture to a classroom or manage a team of engineers. This juxtaposition of faith and reason, secular and religious, traditionalism and modernity make Orthodox Jewish women a paradox of American society.

Orthodox Jewish Women and the Practice of Niddah

The rituals surrounding menstruation (known as niddah) in Orthodox and ultra-Orthodox Jewish sects exacerbate many of the conflicts between modernity and traditional Judaism. Halakha (Jewish rabbinical law) considers a woman impure or unclean during and slightly after her menstrual cycle. Niddah forbids any physical contact among husbands and wives for a period of two weeks. She must not sleep in the same bed as her spouse. Rabbinical code also places restrictions on a menstruating woman’s cooking and dress (Hartman and Marmon, 390). Niddah’s humiliating and offensive designation of menstruating women as “unclean” leads many feminists and outside observers to harshly criticize Orthodox Judaism as patriarchal and misogynistic. Orthodox Jews cannot ignore modern society’s condemnations, confusion, and demands. Although a more supportive Jewish community for the devout exists in Israel, Orthodox Jewish women remain irrevocably part of the modern world. Western cultural norms and expectations pervade nearly every corner of the globe. For better or worse, Orthodox and ultra-Orthodox Jewish women must find a way to incorporate or accommodate modernity. In many ways, Orthodox Jewish women are products of the modernity.

Hartman and Marmon’s sociological study of Orthodox Jewish women living in Israel (a percentage being of American extraction) illustrates a heightened awareness of feminist language and dialogue. A significant portion of the women denied any feelings of “oppression” as a result of niddah or Jewish laws more generally. Many of the interviewees volunteered a defense of Orthodox Judaism against feminist arguments without any provocation on the part of the interviewer (393). The survey clearly indicates that Orthodox women struggled to a certain degree with religious identity in a modern world. Despite the uneasiness many Orthodox Jewish women feel, the study rejects the claim that tension stemmed solely or even partly from patriarchal subjugation. The authors asserted a much more complex and “nuanced” understanding of traditional Judaism and modernity that attempts to view Orthodox Jewish women within the context of Orthodox Judaism. The study analyzes the interpretations of Orthodox Jewish women, yet still remains critical and objective about the responses these women offered. Niddah serves as a particularly interesting tenet of Orthodox Judaism because of its controversial nature. Niddah highlights the clash between two seemingly opposing viewpoints.

The women in the survey expressed a wide range of opinions about the practice of niddah. Although the complaints varied, the women showed no desire to reject niddah or Orthodox Judaism more broadly (398). Some of the women spoke of the utter loneliness felt without sexual or physical contact for such a long period of time. The separation, as one woman suggested, proves especially difficult for new couples who need time to adjust to the ritual and tend to be more amorous than older couples (394). One woman named Yosefa suffered many emotional crises from lack of physical contact with her husband during the three and a half months she spotted after giving birth. She knew that if she explained the situation to her rabbi, he would almost certainly grant her permission to touch her husband. The prospect of needing “permission” to hug or kiss her husband outraged Yosefa (395). Other women recounted the “burdensome” nature of niddah’s physical checks. Niddah requires twice daily checks during the second week to ensure the end of a woman’s period. The women found the checks “invasive” and inconvenient. The authors made an important point about most of the religious women’s criticisms:

These women’s complaints about the niddah ritual fall roughly into the category of inconvenience as outlined above. This is not to dismiss or belittle their grievances, only to highlight the fact that they are framed more in terms of logistical annoyances than as threats to identity. (394)

Orthodox Jewish women, as the study suggested, seem to accept that a religious lifestyle demands strict adherence to Judaism’s tenets - even the painful and irritating rules.

The Orthodox women in the survey discussed feeling dread every time spotting occurred between periods. When a woman notices a “stain” on her sheets, clothes or undergarments, she must consult her rabbi. The rabbi judges the stained item in person and declares the woman clean or unclean (397). The women quoted in the survey appeared to loathe this particular practice more than most of niddah’s other requirements. Most women in the study greatly resented the interference of a male rabbi into such personal matters. One woman found a clever way to cope with the embarrassment and fear of rabbinical judgment. She knew that a rabbi might tell her to cease physical contact with her husband. Her solution involved seeking out rabbis she knew would grant her some “leniency” on the matter (397).

Many of the Orthodox women polled promoted the benefits of niddah. Although feminists label Orthodox Judaism as patriarchal, some of the individuals surveyed asserted that women-not men-control niddah. Even though rabbis oversee the ritual and advice when necessary, the ultimate authority lies with the women. The women conduct the checks, enforce the sexual abstinence, and decide when niddah ends (399). Niddah also provides, as some women argued, a way for wives to say “no” to their husbands sexual advances. Women choose when after the two-week period to end sexual abstinence, which grants women a certain sexual freedom within their marriages (400). Niddah also encourages the sexual fulfillment of women, according to the interviewees, and gives women some sexual power (402). These Orthodox women framed niddah in the context of the rest of halakha. Niddah seems irrelevant or nonsensical in the modern world, the women maintained, but most of Orthodox Judaism’s rituals do, as well. A religious woman must accept niddah for the same reason she accepts Judaism’s other rituals: true faith and devotion to G-d.

Orthodox Jewish women are not protected or insulated from the modern world. The women in Hartman and Marmon’s study showed that modernity creeps into Judaism. The requirements Orthodox Judaism poses strongly conflict with a modern woman’s expectation of love, marriage, childrearing, and sex. Orthodox women occasionally stand at odds with the rules Judaism thrusts upon them, but ultimately view the sacrifices as worth the trouble.

Working Orthodox Women: The Conflicting Demands of Religion and the Free Market

In Orthodox and ultra-Orthodox households, husbands typically enter kollel (religious schooling) for a number of years before pursuing a career. The Orthodox Jewish community places an intrinsic value on males receiving religious teaching. In the United States, Orthodox Jewish families struggle financially during the husband’s religious study. The wife, although not expected to earn an income later on in the marriage, often temporarily stands in as the primary breadwinner throughout her husband’s kollel. Occasionally, her husband finds a part-time job to coincide with his religious education. Jewish religious leaders expect women to find jobs in female- or religiously oriented professions. In addition, since Orthodox Judaism places extreme important on childrearing within the first few years of marriage, wives must sometimes balance working full time, raising children, and taking care of household chores and duties. All of these expectations put immense pressure on Orthodox women to fulfill the role of the ideal Jewish wife as supportive, self-sacrificing, and understanding of her husband’s religious obligations. Thus, Orthodox Jewish women feel pulled in two different directions: these women must serve as dutiful Orthodox wives and mothers, as well as income earners in the secular world. The Israeli government provides some welfare-like assistance for families with a husband in kollel. In the United States, however, free-market capitalism reigns, which means that the Orthodox wife must bear the burden of supporting her husband and children alone or rely on her parents’ supplementary income (Shai, 104-105). Orthodox Jewish women who live in modern societies find some difficulty meeting religious and secular pressures.

The Orthodox women in Shai’s study discussed the time-consuming nature of a religious and secular coexistence. Women tended to complain mostly about not seeing their husbands nearly often enough. The kollel husband spends most of his time dedicated to religious study. The wife, in turn, completes all of the other household tasks, which leaves little time for intimacy and bonding between spouses. Shai observed that “[e]ven women who were adamant about marrying a man who would study in a kollel often expressed loneliness due to the husband’s constant involvement in activities which exclude women” (105).The ultra-Orthodox women interviewed support their husbands’ religious education - an education Orthodox Judaism denies women. In other words, Orthodox Judaism prevents women from receiving advanced religious study and from fully joining the secular world. Orthodox women walk a very fine line between modernity and tradition. Ultra-Orthodox Jewish scripture and leaders discourage women from pursuing secular passions, such as a university education and career. Despite the problematic aspects of ultra-Orthodox Judaism, the Orthodox women in the survey largely accepted the burdens of kollel (105-106). The stresses and the loneliness, rather than the hypocrisy, affected the women most.

Feminism

Women who choose to embrace Jewish Orthodoxy and who accept Halakha (process by which Talmudic Law is applied to real-life) as a given, are agreeing to live by a patriarchal system. It is not surprising then that many feminists criticize women who choose to live under these codes. But to judge an Orthodox lifestyle as inherently anti-feminist, is to reject the full set of values that modern feminists promote.

In the case of most Modern Orthodox women are not outright rejecting feminist values but rather rejecting the feminist movement as anti-religious (Manning, 85). In the 1970s when feminism was still finding its form, women strove to downplay differences between genders in order to achieve equality (86). As feminist studies the emphasis shifted instead to women as different yet equal, meaning that women’s needs were different than men’s and should be addressed separately (86). To understand Orthodox Jewish women in the context of feminism, we will use this latter understanding of the gender which places women as equal to men but different in their needs and desires of nurturance, motherhood, and family.

The most problematic moment for feminists about Orthodox is their acceptance to live by Halakha. Halakha are a set of Talmudic laws as they apply to real-life, but the interpretation of said laws is performed by a male Rabbi (87). This means that all laws are subject to a male interpretation and viewpoint that will always remain somewhat problematic to outsiders and feminists. But while Orthodox women choose to subject themselves to these Patriarchal constructs in their religious and home lives, in the case of most Modern Orthodox women, their views are predominately feminist in the secular world.

The Modern Orthodox movement grew primarily out of concern for women’s feeling of displacement in a patriarchal society (Wolowelsky, 12). In the case of these women, most follow Kashrut (Jewish dietary laws) in the home and allow Halakha to dictate their prayer and family values. But in the many facets of secular society including work, politics, and secular education, Modern Orthodox women support equality for women. Orthodox women find themselves in traditionally masculine jobs or study like engineering or composing (Manning, 90). According to one Orthodox women interviewed, a woman’s innate quality of empathy makes her better suited to roles of leadership than men and she believes that Jewish law supports this (91).

Modern Orthodox women justify these mixed elements of pro and anti-feminist stances by saying their concern is over a secular world corrupting tradition. A women’s role in secular society does not negate her duty in the home or her support of her religious study (181). To a Modern Orthodox woman, secular studies remain independent of her religion and an Orthodox women might push routinely to have her daughter participate in advanced math or science classes, but wouldn’t question her being behind a mechitza (separation curtain) in shul (Wolowelsky, 15).

There is no question that Orthodox men are almost completely against a feminist movement within the culture (Cantor, 416). While most support their wives working traditionally masculine jobs because this allows the men to continue their job of religious study and prayer there is still great resistance against allowing women to participate in male roles within the religious aspects of life. A woman being allowed to conduct the prayers and stand on the bimah would have a castrating effect on the men that find these acts the very symbol of manhood. Likewise, many women fear participating in these rituals would ostracize them and cut them off from the traditions they cherish (423).

While Modern Orthodox women are secular feminists and religious traditionalists, their Chasidic counterparts are not so progressive. But in the case of many Chasidic women who are more right-wing in their secular views, there are protections in place to keep them from suffering under the oppression of patriarchy. To an outsider rituals like niddah (menstrual rules) might seem oppressive but to Chasidic women, many find the rituals to be a comfort that allows women to regulate her own sexual activities. More importantly, Chasidic societies tend to support their women by placing pressure on men to treat them justly even if not mandated by Halakha.

One striking example of this feminist social support surrounds the traditions of divorce. Halakha stipulates that a man must give a woman a get (divorce document) and because of Chasidic women strictly adhering to such laws, a man may extort the woman for custody of the children and large sums of money. If she does not give the man what he wants she will become agunot (chained) and be unable to remarry without his consent But men who do these things now find themselves punished by their community; not allowed to participate in rituals of honor. Moreover, women can use the rules of niddah and refuse to participate in mikvah (cleansing ritual) making the husband unable to resume sexual activity (Cantor, 432).

While both Modern Orthodox and Chasidic women strictly adhere to a patriarchal system of beliefs there are protections in place. In the case of Modern Orthodox women there is also great leeway in secular life to become masters of their domain. While some feminists may not understand the choices of their religious counterparts, most Orthodox women are satisfied with the roles permitted by their religion and do not feel in any great way oppressed.

Conclusion

Orthodox Jewish women, as necessarily part of modern society, encounter immense difficulties with the rules and expectations Judaism and the Jewish community demand. The tension between modernity and a traditional Jewish lifestyle poses a unique set of challenges on Orthodox Jewish women. Despite the very real complaints and modern temptations, the vast majority of Orthodox Jewish women remain devout to Judaism. Our research indicates that Orthodox women find certain aspects of the religion burdensome, archaic, and patriarchal. One source conducted extensive research on how the ba’alot teshuvah (women who converted to Orthodox Judaism after the age of twelve) typically lose “preobservant” friendships at an unusually high rate. The study also delved into the loss of familial connections and bonds when one relative chooses to commit to Orthodox Judaism (Schwartzbaum et al, 266-272). Strict adherence to Orthodox Judaism pushes women to wrestle with their religious and female (which usually includes modern) identities. The result varies, but generally speaking Orthodox Jewish women believe Judaism offers women fulfillment - a fulfillment lacking in the secular world. Thus, although modernity and Orthodox Judaism stand at odds, devout women intertwine the two worlds to form an identity that breaks with and accommodates the mainstream society.

Bibliography

 

Cantor, Aviva. Jewish Women / Jewish Men: The Legacy of Patriarchy in Jewish Life. San Francisco: Harper, 1995.

Diner, Hasia and B. L. Benderly. Her Works Praise Her: A History of Jewish Women in America from Colonial Times to the Present. New York: Basic Books, 2002.

Hartman, Tova and Naomi Marmon. “Lived Regulations, Systemic Attributions: Menstrual Separation and Ritual Immersion in the Experience of Orthodox Jewish Women.” Gender & Society. Volume 18, Issue 3 (June 2004).

Manning, Christel. God Gave Us the Right: Conservative Catholic, Evangelical Protestant, and Orthodox Jewish Women Grapple with Feminism. New Jersey: Rutgers University Press, 1999.

Schwartzbaum, Avraham, David Hartman and Maureen Hockenberger. “Religious Identity and Psychology Well-Being among Newly Orthodox Jewish Women.” Sociological Practice Volume 1, Issue 4 (1999).

Shai, Donna. “Working Women/Cloistered Men: A Family-Development Approach to Marriage Arrangements among Ultra-Orthodox Jews.” Journal of Comparative Family Studies Volume 33, Issue 1 (2002).

Wolowelsky, Joel. Women, Jewish Law and Modernity: New Opportunities in a Post-Feminist Age. New Jersey: KTAV Publishing House, 1997.